I shot the TV, but I didn't shoot the tab-elet ♫

Why...

Am I supposed to watch the same TV commercial from 1st November through to December 25th without eventually hating it and the company it’s advertising? Even Manuel Noriega went mad as the US Marines continuously blasted a couple of David Bowie records at him in his palace. After a couple of days he begged for mercy. Yet I will have watched the latest two or three minute Christmas extravaganzas for a dozen major brands more than 100 times each. By mid-December I would rather put out my lighted hair with a hammer than visit any of the advertised stores. I cannot be alone. Market research must tell them such an assault is counter-productive or do they really think the production values will keep us watching.

...and another thing

It’s the same with Christmas Carols that play in every store I walk into. It’s always the same five or six. I just run out now as shop assistants with elf ears and pointy hats with bells on look shocked at my strange behaviour!!

I am no grinch. I actually enjoy Christmas. Friendship, family, overeating but quite why me needing to buy someone battery heated socks or worse receiving PC gifts like a donation gift made in my name to a charity I don’t support, is beyond me!

...and another thing

Traditional food is going the way of airline sandwiches (see past blog Welcome Aboard is Enough) and becoming ridiculously complicated. Instead of Roast Turkey we now have to have Nine Bird Rolls with an ever decreasing size of bird stuffed into the breast cavity of the previous one like some roasted Russian Doll set. (Turkey, goose, chicken, pheasant, duck, poussin, partridge, pigeon and teal). Christmas plum puddings, (desserts for you Americans) now come made with cumquats and rambutans, topped by sloe gin butter rather than brandy. Even simple potatoes are roasted in goose fat infused with truffles…. yet despite this cornucopia of change I still find myself with a plateful of Brussel sprouts.

...and another thing

So with all this change and deluge of commercials I find myself retreating more and more to streaming services on my iPad. If there is one tradition I can still continue with, it’s that I can watch the Wizard of Oz and Miracle on 34th Street (just to see if I still remember all the lines) but now on a service with no commercials, or at least ones I can fast forward through. That’s at least progress. (Does anyone wants a shotgun pellet riddled TV)?

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2 Comments

  1. Avatar Peter says:

    I totally agree with you. The ones that drive me mad are in relation to insurance aggregation sites. Such as last-minute.com and the one with that ruddy meerkat. Mind you I’m also fed up with the sheer materialism of Christmas. I keep trying to persuade my children to give to charities rather than to buy presents for me and I will do the same. No luck they send me their lists with Amazon links and expect me to settle on one of the items. I agree with you about all the indulgence– far too much of it. The puritans cancelled Christmas when they were running the country. Good man that Cromwell!

  2. Avatar sister wright says:

    All traditional here, although having pork on this Sunday and pecan pie by your good wife. But come the 25th, the only thing The Family insist on are Yorkshire Puds. Am enjoying the John Lewis send ups! PS not donating a thing in your name. Not even a Brussel Sprout!