Are we always so glad to see the end of one year? Yes, there have occasionally been a pretty putrid last 12 months, but on balance the good times have always outweighed the hideous. Often it feels like waving a tearful farewell to a good year; rather like a well-worn pair of cowboy boots that took time to wear in but now are very comfortable. Instead, we are being asked to swap them for a new pair that might not be as good.
As well all standing around singing Auld Lang Syne (or the first two lines, as no one knows any more), what goodies have we got to look forward to in 2026? Well, of course FIFA will again make an egregious amount of money out of the World Cup, with the usual smug, blazered men trousering mountains of cash. No change there, then.
We get a total eclipse in August in Europe. Not that unusual, and there will be the same stories of the morons who damaged their eyes looking up at the sun. More interesting, perhaps is that 2026 is packed with deliberately ridiculous observances like Festival of Sleep Day, Make Your Dream Come True Day, Ditch New Yearâs Resolutions Day, National Hugging Day and Beer Can Appreciation Day⊠all in January alone.
We do have a few surprising anniversaries. Itâs the 30th Birthday of PokĂ©man, the 40th Birthday of Top Gun, 50th of the Apple computer and 100 years of Winnie-the-Pooh. That will either mean nothing more than a shoulder shrug to you, as you are still in the first flush of youth, or you will flush as you realise how ancient you are!
In reality, and despite all the evidence others might whip up, I am an optimist. A writer and entrepreneur demands it. I could look at things as being sometimes disappointing but of course, the optimist in me just says I am moving forward. And thatâs my wish for you all. In 2026, just keep moving forward!
Why...
Would anyone go Christmas shopping in town anymore? Crowds of people, traffic moving slower than treacle, and endless Christmas songs. I understand Mariah Carey has made nearly $100m in royalties on âAll I Want for Christmas is you.â Thatâs enough to turn me into the Grinch.
...and another thing (continue to read this post)
Why...
Do I still have a couple of racks of ties that beg me to put them on every time I open my wardrobe instead of throwing them away? Firstly I cannot forget the eye watering cost! Hermes ties, which were de rigeur in my days in the City are now over ÂŁ200 each. I must have fifty! Let alone a smorgasbord of others; even my School House tie of skull and crossbones from my days at Rugby School. If I have worn a tie more than a dozen times in the nine years since moving to Malta (outside of funerals or marriages) I would be surprisedâŠ..and yet. I accept the current method of showing your superiority in meetings is a black polo and Birkenstock sandals rather than a Gieves and Hawkes suit, Turnbull and Asser shirt and Loeb shoes, but who does that impress? Dressing well is not only about self respect but respect to others. The idea you can dress like a tramp to show you are so rich you donât need to show esteem sends out all the wrong signals. My days of business meetings are few and far between but if I am seeking a partner let alone financial resources dressing with dignity for who Iâm talking to, usually pays off.
...and another thing (continue to read this post)
Why...
Do so many cop shows feature earnest looking detectives flashing a torch as they enter a building looking for someone, when there is a perfectly good light switch nearby?
Flashlights are quickly joining forces with other cop cliches
1) How bad the coffee is in a police station,
2) Thereâs always a parking spot right where itâs needed
3) A cop with a troubled home life or estranged spouse, leading to personal phone interruptions mid-case.
4) The mismatched partners forced to work together, often a âfamily manâ paired with a âlonerâ or eccentric cop
5) The cantankerous police boss who constantly chews out the main cop and threatens to take their badge.
6) The cell phone signal dropping or battery expiring at a vital moment And finally
7) Police and FBI fighting over jurisdiction with âThis is OUR case!â arguments.
...and another thing (continue to read this post)
Why...
Do I give inanimate objects a personality? When Basil Fawlty from sitcom Fawlty Towers scolds his car and warns it if it does not start he would give it âa damn good thrashingâ then proceeds to attack it with a tree trunk, I canât help but laugh. Not because of Fawlty but I believe the car didnât start out of its own sheer bloody-mindedness. As a petrolhead, I have owned a wide variety of cars over the years. Some I used to talk to on long drives, discussing everything from sex to politics. Others I barely grunted at, certain they had a perverse desire to tip me into the nearest hedgerow and get a different owner. Only very few did I not communicate with at all. Those lasted the shortest time in my ownership. The attribution of emotion to inanimate objects might seem daft, but in fact it covers up a multitude of sins. Lawnmower wonât start? Itâs because itâs pissed about being dirty; not the reality of you buying a duff brand. By giving âthingsâ a soul, you give them an âexcuseâ for not always working for other reasons than just being not a good choice. Itâs a backstop for my ego. âDarling, the oven switched off halfway through cooking the turkey, not because I set the timer wrong but because it didnât like the oven cleaner you used last time. Christmas lunch will now be Christmas dinner.â
...and another thing (continue to read this post)
